The mental load app

Stop arguing
about who does more.
Find out.

Log what you both carry over three days. Get a Partnership Score built from real data, not feelings. Then turn it into a plan — domain ownership, weekly check-ins, and a shared calendar your whole home can see.

Google Play coming soon

Today
+ Log task
How are you carrying things today?
😓
Struggling
😤
Stretched
🙂
Getting by
😊
Good
🚀
Full steam
J
Jamie
Checked in · Stretched today
Updated
Your tasks today
School lunch prep & packed bags 9m
Called doctor re: appointment 23m
Grocery run + weekly meal plan 1h
☀️
Today
📅
Plan
📊
Score
🎗️
Coach
80%

of couples report one partner carries the majority of household management after having children.

Harvard Business Review, 2023
62%

of couples say the mental load is their biggest source of ongoing conflict.

APA, 2022
26%

of partners doing less believe any imbalance exists at all. The gap isn't effort — it's awareness.

Pew Research, 2023
Why Tether exists

The argument has no resolution without data.

Every couple has a version of this conversation. One partner knows they're carrying more — the school admin, the mental calendar, the emotional labour, the noticing. The other isn't sure that's true. Nobody has evidence. It becomes a stalemate.

The problem isn't communication. It's that there's no shared starting point. One person's lived experience against another's perception — and perception almost always flatters the person doing less.

You can't negotiate from a feeling. You can negotiate from data.

And the longer this goes without a shared starting point, the more it compounds. Resentment doesn't reset on its own. Neither do the patterns.

"Tether doesn't take sides. It just shows both of you what's actually happening."

How it works

Three days of data.
A plan built from
what you actually find.

Both partners log independently. The data is neutral. Everything that follows is built from your specific situation — not a generic template.

01
Free

Check in daily. Log what you do.

Each day, both partners check in on how they're carrying things — struggling, stretched, getting by, or full steam. Then log tasks as they happen: physical work, planning, emotional support. Five minutes a day.

02
Free

Get your Partnership Score

After 3 days, Tether surfaces your score — a clear breakdown of who's carrying what, across physical tasks, planning, emotional support, and self-initiation. Always free, no paywall.

03
Tether Plus

Build your plan — and actually stick to it

Each partner owns entire life domains. Set recurring tasks that appear automatically. Do a guided weekly check-in together — capacity, what you're carrying, what you need — on your own device, in your own time. Syncs to Google Calendar, Apple Calendar, and Skylight.

04
Tether Plus

Track progress with fortnightly reports

Every fortnight, Tether surfaces a clear snapshot of what changed — and what didn't. One measurable improvement per fortnight is the goal. Both partners can see the movement, not just feel it.

✓ Always free — no paywall
67 /100 Getting there
Week 1 Partnership Score
The Partnership Score

The number couples have needed for years.

The Partnership Score isn't a verdict — it's the first piece of evidence both partners can actually agree on. Not one word against the other's. Not feelings versus feelings. Just what happened, logged in real time, by both of you. And it's always free.

🏠
Physical tasks · 20%
Cooking, cleaning, childcare, errands. The work you can see.
📋
Planning & admin · 30%
Booking, remembering, organising. The thinking that never stops.
💛
Emotional support · 30%
Managing feelings, conflict, relationships. The work with no receipt.
Self-initiation · 20%
Noticing what needs doing without being asked. The rarest metric of all.
For the partner doing it alone

Your partner not ready? You don't need them to be.

Log your own three days. Unlock your personal load report. See exactly what you're carrying — broken down by type, by who initiated it, by how often you had to notice it yourself.

Then share your results card. Your data is the most persuasive thing you can send them. Their side will be blank. You won't need to say anything else.

My mental load
34 tasks logged
3-day report · Week 1
11 Physical
14 Planning
6 Emotional
21 Self-started
Jamie
hasn't logged yet — 0 tasks
Tether Plus

Awareness is the start.
The plan is what changes it.

Once you have your score, Tether Plus gives you the organisational layer — so you stop renegotiating the same tasks every week and start owning entire areas of your life together.

🗂️
Domain ownership
Each partner takes full ownership of entire life areas — not just individual tasks. Cooking, school admin, finances. Whoever owns the domain owns the thinking, not just the doing.
🔁
Recurring tasks
Set up what happens weekly, fortnightly, or monthly — and who's responsible. Tasks show up automatically each week so nothing falls through the cracks and nothing needs re-negotiating.
📅
Guided weekly check-in
A structured 4-step flow both partners complete independently each week — capacity, what you're carrying, what you need, and what to hand over. No joint calendar required. Each partner gets a push notification reminder on their chosen day and time.
🗓️
Calendar sync — Google, Apple & Skylight
Your recurring tasks sync automatically to Google Calendar and Apple Calendar via a private iCal feed. Works with Skylight family displays too — so your shared plan is always visible in your home, not just on your phone.
📈
Fortnightly progress reports
A clear snapshot of what changed — and what didn't. One measurable improvement per fortnight is the goal. The report makes it visible so both partners can see the movement.
📤
Shareable results card
A beautifully designed card showing your Partnership Score, task breakdown, and the imbalance in numbers. The most persuasive thing you can send your partner — and it requires no argument.
Your Plan
Week of 2 June
Weekly Check-in
📅
Start your weekly check-in
Capacity · What you're carrying · What you need · Hand-offs
Start check-in →
Domains & Recurring Tasks
🍳 Cooking & meals
Ashley · Daily
Plan weekly meals
Grocery order · Weekly
🏫 School admin
Jamie · Weekly
Check school comms · Daily
Pack bags · Daily
🗓️
Syncs to Skylight & Google Calendar
Your tasks appear on your family display
☀️
Today
📅
Plan
📊
Score
🎗️
Coach
Calendar sync

Your plan, visible
in your home.

Tether syncs your recurring tasks to Google Calendar as a private iCal feed. If you use a Skylight family display, your tasks appear there automatically — no extra setup.

Private iCal feed — one link, both partners' tasks
Syncs to Google Calendar, Apple Calendar
Works with Skylight and any calendar display
🗓️ Connect in the app → Plan tab
Pricing

Start free. Go deeper
when you're ready.

Logging is free. The Partnership Score is free. Premium unlocks when you have the data in front of you and you're ready to do something with it.

Free
$0
forever
 
  • 3-day logging period
  • Partnership Score (0–100) — always free
  • Full breakdown by labour type
  • Daily capacity check-in
  • Partner task requests
  • Domain ownership planning
  • Recurring tasks & weekly planning
Download free
Tether Plus
Monthly
billed monthly
Cancel anytime
  • Everything in Free
  • Domain ownership planning
  • Recurring tasks — daily, weekly, fortnightly, monthly
  • Guided weekly check-in with push reminders
  • Calendar sync — Google, Apple & Skylight
  • Fortnightly progress reports
  • Shareable results card
Download on the App Store

Pricing shown in the app at checkout, localized to your region. Each partner purchases their own account. Both see your shared progress. Cancel anytime.

The cost of not starting

Ten years from now,
you'll look back on this
one of two ways.

You'll either wish you'd said something — that you'd found a way to explain what you were carrying before it quietly became everything. Before the resentment calcified into the relationship. Before you stopped believing it would ever actually change.

Or you'll be grateful you did something. That instead of waiting for a conversation that never came, you got the data first. That you had an honest starting point — one neither of you could argue with. That you built a plan and actually changed the dynamic in your home.

Nothing changes on its own. Not the mental load, not the noticing, not the pattern that's been quietly building for years. The conversation doesn't happen unless someone starts it. The balance doesn't shift unless something shifts it.

Three days of logging won't fix your relationship. But it's the first honest thing you can do. And in five years, you'll be so glad you actually took the plunge — instead of spending another five years waiting for it to get better on its own.

You can wake up in ten years and wish you'd said something.
Or you can start the three-day log today.

Free to start. Partnership Score always included.

Now available

Tether is live on
the App Store.

Free to download. Start logging in minutes. Partnership Score always included at no cost.

Download on the App Store
Google Play — coming soon